Today someone’s hopes lay dying against the rocks
Today the waves comes crashing down
Reminding her of what is not to be
Reminding her that in nine months there will be no tiny feet
Her husband’s eyes won’t be staring back
Her nose won’t be crinkled on another little face
She beats the ground with her balled up fist
She wipes the tears and puts on a calm face
Wondering if this dream will ever come true
Wondering if this nightmare will ever fade at last
Advice is offered once again, it’s not the right time
Advice is offered once again, relax and it will happen
But the pain still feels the same, gut-wrenching
But the pain still feels the same, heart-breaking
And no amount of comfort can be offered
And no consoling words can bring relief
She watches other ships set sail in the distance
She watches other families grow and evolve
In the flotsam and jetsam she waits, struggling to afloat
In the cold harsh water she clings to the cross she bears
By Kim Caloca
I read this poem and tears streamed down my face…I’ve been this woman for a long time….I can’t explain why or even how my heart has changed. The only thing I know is the Lord has done it….He’s changed my outlook, my desires, my hope.
A few weeks ago I thought I might be pregnant…To be honest it scared me. Terrified me…I even mentioned to Kaz and my good friend
Sabrina that I HOPED I wasn’t pregnant….Why you ask? Why wouldn’t I want to be pregnant when the last 2 years all of my hurt and pain has come from me NOT getting pregnant…I honestly can’t explain it except the Lord changed me...He changed my heart. He truly gave me new eyes….He changed my desire RIGHT NOW to adopting a child. I know a lot of people probably doesn’t understand this…and that’s ok. I don’t think adopting is for everyone BUT I’m overjoyed that HE CHOSE ME to adopt. He CHOSE me to go through this trial for the last 2+ years. He CHOSE a SPECIAL child for ME…a child who NEEDS a family and love. LOVE is what I can give that child. Oh how I long to meet him or her….How I long to get a phone call saying we have a child for you….I can only imagine what that day will be like.
The woman above was me for 2 years….The woman today is
HOPEFUL and filled with
JOY and excitement for what’s to come!
Blessed be the name of the
Lord
Blessed be
HIS name
He
gives and
takes away….Blessed be
YOUR name Lord