child like faith...

It’s been so neat seeing Annie Rice really want to learn about God and pray. She literally wants to read her bible all the time[The Jesus Storybook Bible is awesome], and she prays before every meal and before naptime and bedtime. I can’t help but laugh though at some of her prayers...I know they are so sincere and coming from a sweet little girl, but some of the stuff she prays for, I just can’t help but wonder where she gets it from. BUT I love hearing her pray, and we’ve had to remind ourselves we will never discourage her from reading the bible, no matter how many times she ask us in a day to read it to her[I counted 1 day and she asked almost 30 times:)]. Sometimes, I will walk in her room and she’s sitting on the bed, reading it. Such a sweet thing to see. AND most days, she makes Minnie Mouse, Bear, Goofy, baby, and her by[blanket] get on their knees and pray too! Here have been a few of her prayers lately...

“Thank you God for lunch, thank you God for chicken and fries, watching dickey mouse, Gaines and Brynn, reading bible, seeing mommy, gym, Amen.”

“Thank you God for cereal, the wise men, the shepherd, joseph, baby Jesus, and Mary too, Amen.”

“Thank you God for daddy, for o my soul, shepherd boy, neck, Annie Rice’s neck, Mommy’s neck, Maggie’s neck, and car’s neck, Amen.”

“Thank you God for cars, for Maggie’s neck, phone’s neck, Annie Rice’s neck, thank you God for God is able, for shepherd, umm what’s next, thank you God for miss jill, joey, the angel, the king, the shepherd boy, the shepherd, thank you God for baby’s neck, Amen. “

“Thank you God for trash, for outside trash, for stinky diaper, for phew whee, ummm what’s next, Amen.”

“Thank you God for chicken and fries, milk, chocolate chip milk, 12345678910, ummm what’s next, thank you God for one, thank you God for two, thank you God for three, Amen.”

Come to think of it, my prayers should really be more like this...So many times I forget to THANK GOD for the small things and not just the big things. Child like faith...

HIS protection...

 Last week, we spent the whole week in the mountains with Kaz’s family. We rented a cabin in Beech Mountain, NC and had a wonderful week with family and a week free from cell phone service and internet service...it was very nice! 

We booked the cabin back in the summer and I never imagined that we would be celebrating Thanksgiving as a family of 4. We sure are blessed. On Thanksgiving night, I had a lot more to be THANKFUL for than when the morning started...Let me explain. 

The cabin that we stayed in had 3 stories[upstairs, main level, and basement]. Annie Rice has been working hard in therapy for the last few months on climbing stairs. Since we don’t have stairs in our house, she has to practice on 2 blocks. I was thrilled when we got the cabin and saw just how much she loved climbing the stairs. She would literally go up them 20 times+ a day. Kaz and I were so proud, because she has been working so hard on climbing stairs and she was not crawling up them, but climbing them holding onto the railing. She became really good at it, enjoyed it, and became so proud herself. On Thanksgiving, I went down to the basement to get something. She was not far behind me. I started down the stairs and made it to the bottom and had turned the corner, when I heard Annie Rice scream followed by a thump. I turned around and when I got to the stairs, what I witnessed has left a horrible image in my mind. I didn’t realize it at the time, but the basement stairs were a little deeper and she couldn’t reach the railing. She slipped on the top step and literally bounced like a ball all the way to the bottom step where I caught her. She bounced on the wood stairs from her head to her feet numerous times. I saw her eyes go back in her head as she hit each stair on her head, and by the time I got to her I was crying more than she was. She cried hysterically for 30 minutes. I held her as tight as I could and wanted to rush right out and go to the hospital. Since I saw it, I couldn’t imagine that there wouldn’t be any damage. I yelled for Kaz and when he came down, we prayed over her precious little head. For the next 30 minutes, I blamed myself thinking I should have waited on her. I should have held her hand. I wished I could go back and erase the whole thing. I was scared out of my mind that something was wrong with her head. Since she had plagiocephaly as a child, and still has a soft spot on her head, the thoughts crossing through my mind were horrible. We continued to pray over her and within about 40 minutes she was completely back to her normal self, with a big goose egg on her head. We watched her closely for the next couple of hours, and after seeing the “normal Annie Rice” we decided not to go to the doctor. After the whole thing happened, I just wanted to get away and cry my eyes out. I have never been so scared in my whole life. 

One of the things that I loved most about being in the mountains, was seeing the deer in our yard everyday. We saw anywhere from 4-10 every day, and each time I would see one out of the window, I would sneak out onto the porch to watch them. I did that on Thanksgiving night, and was reminded of the Lord’s protection over His children. I believe He had a shield around Annie Rice as she fell down those 18 steps. For her to have no injuries other than a goose egg and a lot of black/blue bruises is a miracle. I had a lot more to be THANKFUL for on Thanksgiving than what I started the morning off with. 

His goodness and FAITHFULNESS in my life increases more and more each day, and I don’t deserve any of the blessings He has given me. BUT I will praise HIM each day for the trials and the blessings that He entrusts me with. I have SO MUCH to be thankful for. 

As for God, His way is perfect; the word of the Lord is proven; He is a shield to all who trust in Him. Psalm 18:30

trusting in HIM...

Do you ever have one of those days you wish you could just start over and maybe it would turn out better than it did?

Yesterday was that day for me. I started Hello Mornings recently. It’s been a great way for other women to hold each other accountable for getting up early, getting in the word, and exercising before our children get up. I’ve done pretty good so far. In the past, I would wake up when Annie Rice woke up, go the gym and then do bible study during her nap. Lately, I’ve been getting up earlier and doing all of that before she wakes up. 

On Tuesday night, I had bible study. It usually last pretty late and the only show I’ve been watching lately comes on Tuesday nights at 10, so I decided to stay up late and watch it and then just get up around 630 yesterday morning. Annie Rice wakes up between 745-830 so I knew I would still have plenty of time and then we could go to the YMCA later that day together. Over the last several days, Annie Rice has been going through something...I think it’s a combination of a cold, 2 year molar, etc but she hasn’t been herself at all. I got up at 630 yesterday morning and Annie Rice woke up at 645! Almost 2 hours earlier than normal. She was not in a good mood and cried pretty much all morning. She didn’t want to listen to anything I said. She has her moments like any child, but that is not her at all.  We got to the doctor’s office and she was a different child. She was her normal self again, just as happy as she could be, talking and laughing at everyone. 

When the doctor came in, he did the normal stuff for a yearly checkup and proceeded to tell me that her head circumference was way out of line with her weight and height. Basically they are at the bottom end of the scale and her head circumference is over the 100th percentile. He said he was really concerned about it. At first, I didn’t understand but then as he started talking it all made sense. When Annie Rice was born, she had torticollis and as a result developed plagiocephaly and had to wear a helmet. That’s really all we know from her past. His concern was that because her head circumference has grown so much in the last few months, and in comparison with her height and weight, he was cornered something was going on inside her head causing pressure and swelling. He said that may NOT be the case, but he wanted to keep a close watch on it and check back up in 2 months. To say I was in shock was an understatement. We have been thrown for a lot of loops with Annie Rice’s development and most of the times we’ve had bad news, I have been shocked, but I definitely didn’t expect to hear anything like this yesterday at her 2 year appointment. I held the tears back until I got in the car and called Kaz. We had lunch plans with some friends at Chick-fila, so we met them after the appointment. Annie Rice started back crying and fighting everything I said, so lunch wasn’t very easy. We were going to let the kids go play in the play area for a bit, so we put them down and started cleaning up. Without me seeing, she picked up a chicken nugget off the floor that she had thrown down earlier and ate it. If only I could have taken a picture of the people’s face beside us...They looked at me like I was the worst mom in the world. It was a look of utter disgust. That didn’t help the situation at all. I finally got home, put Annie Rice down for a much needed nap, and was able to really sit and pray about the whole situation. 

Today is much better than yesterday. I feel so much better and really am trusting the Lord has a perfect plan for Annie Rice. From the very first day we got the phone call about her, we were told the worst case scenario...That has continued to happen through her therapy and development, and in every case the Lord has always worked and that worst case scenario wasn’t even a thought anymore. I’m trusting this is another test of our faith and that HE is in complete control over her and her head/brain. That’s all I can do. I’m not going to worry about this for 2 months until our next checkup. 

When I finally closed my eyes last night, I was so tired and drained. I think we all need days like that to really put our focus on life back into perspective, and sometimes these things are more for my growth than Annie Rice. What so interesting and such a God thing, is the canvas that I just painted for our kitchen. We have been doing some redecorating and I’ve been making a little “art center” to display all of Annie Rice’s drawings. I found this canvas on pinterest that I loved...It was proverbs 3:5, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart.” I had so many other verses that I thought about putting on the canvas, but I decided to do that one instead because I loved the way it looked. I painted the canvas on Monday and Kaz hung it up that night. As I was sitting at the table yesterday, thinking and praying, I looked up and saw that canvas. What a great reminder that the Lord gave me in that time...One that I can look at everyday and cling to. It wasn't just a coincidence that I painted that canvas and that verse this week...it was truly a God thing. I am clinging to this verse and putting my complete trust in Him over Annie Rice’s life...

Will you join me in praying for this sweet little girl?

HE IS SO GOOD....

One thing I know for sure...The Lord’s plan is perfect. I may not always understand it, but I know that His plan for me is the best thing possible in this world. Annie Rice has been the biggest blessing in our life. I look at her every day and wonder how did I get so lucky to have her as my daughter. She was loved before we ever met her...and our heart has grown with so much love for her it could probably explode!  Before we adopted Annie Rice, we knew that she had special needs. We were told her development was a lot worse than it actually was. Since we have gotten her, she has grown so much! She has achieved so many things that she couldn’t do before...At 12 months old, she could roll over and sit up if you put her in that position. That was it! She couldn’t crawl, sit up on her own, hold her own bottle, etc. I can honestly say up until around December, her delays never bothered me. It was something I simply didn't’ struggle with...But after hearing multiple comments from different people, our pediatrician, and even people we didn’t know I let Satan get a wedge in, and this area started to bother me. Play dates with friends who had 6-7 months old, started bothering me because they could do more than Annie Rice could and she was 17-18 months old. I have seen myself get more and more defensive with others when it comes to her development because I have just wanted everyone to see just how far she’s come...I wanted people to see what I have seen her do! But the truth is, it shouldn’t be anyone else’s concern. Annie Rice is loved and she has grown and developed and that should be it....but it’s not that simple:( It has been a daily struggle for me. She started physical therapy and seeing an early interventionist about 3 weeks ago...I think that has added to my struggle because I’m told every week where she should be...Sunday, was one of the hardest days that I’ve had with her development. I struggled all day, talked to Kaz, talked to friends and held back the tears....I just struggled. I KNEW HOW FAR SHE HAD COME BUT I WANTED HER TO WALK....And I know that she will walk just not in my timing...On Monday, she had PT and I had planned on really talking to the PT about some of my concerns. I woke up that morning and prayed that the Lord would do big things that day....I could have jumped up and down with what he did do! My sweet baby girl took 3 steps on her own during PT. She hasn’t taken any since but that’s not the point. The point is, she did it! She has started pushing her shopping cart more and more....taking about 15-25 steps each time she pushes it. I am so proud of her...She bucks and fights us pushing her, but it’s the same way the Lord pushes us. We may not like it, and even though it’s good for us, at the time we are comfortable where we are....It’s amazing how much the Lord shows me through those 2 little eyes. While my struggles with her development will not disappear, I’m thankful that the Lord has given me the strength to keep fighting through them, and that HE is continuing to do big things in this sweet little girls life. I am blessed beyond words....

praying for her...

I mentioned awhile back about the prayer pail that I made for Annie Rice. She absolutely loves it and most nights cries for a minute when we take the stick away:) Our nightly routine is to read a story out of the bible, and then pray using the prayer pail...but lately, I’ve been convicted about one thing. As much as it’s important for us to pray for other people, and for her to learn that, it’s just as important for her to see growing up that mom and dad prayed for her also. I know right now she doesn’t understand that, but she will soon enough, so I decided to add something to our prayer time at night. 

I made little cards with a different thing to pray for Annie Rice about every night. It’s cards that she can flip and play with, but also see growing up the specific ways we are praying for her. The full potential and abundant life that she can have in Christ. I found this list online and just added a few to it[future spouse, glory, etc]. Every card has a word and a verse so not only will she hear us praying those specific things but she will also hear scripture. 

Here is the list that I used...along with a few pictures of my sweet baby girl:)