Tuesday, January 18, 2011

a letter from a birthmom....

I just happened to find this video yesterday on YouTube. It’s a letter from a birthmom. I typed it all so you could read BUT if you have 4 minutes check out the video instead. Kaz and I have had the opportunity through Bethany’s meetings to actually meet birthmom’s and hear their stories. When I saw this video, tears streamed down my face. Kaz and I are praying everyday for our baby’s birthmom, wherever she may be....
To a beautiful young man...
Before I go any further, I want you to know that I love you very much..
You were born on Dec. 19, 1991at 12:35 am..
You weighed 7 lbs, 15.5 oz and you were 19.75 inches long...
You were the most beautifulist baby I had ever seen...
I had to have a c-section with you because your little head would not drop low enough for you to come out....
I was in labor with you for 10 hours before the doctor told me that I was going to have a c-section...
The doctors started working on me at 12:15am, and 20 minutes later, at 12:35am you were born....
You let out a little cry right after you were born, and that was the only time you cried...
I’ll never forget the first time I heard you cry...
It sounded just like a little whine...
I started crying my eyes out..I couldn’t believe I actually had a baby....
It didn’t seem real.
The first day I went on a nursery visit and saw you was on December 21,1991...
When the nurse brought you into the room, I started crying a little bit...
You were so cute...You just laid there in my arms and stared at me...
You kept grabbing a hold of my finger and squeezing it....
I sat and talked to you and told you that I loved you....
Those were the most precious moments of my life...
The next day Dec. 22, 1991, I went back and saw you again...
You had just gotten done being fed when the nurse brought you into see me...
She laid you in my arms and you stared at me again...
I had brought a pair of booties and a blanket to give to you...
I put the booties on your feet and then covered you back up and started rocking you...
Within 15 minutes you were asleep...After you fell asleep, I talked to you...
I told you that the reason I was placing you for adoption was not because I didn’t love you, but because I did love you...
You are the most previous thing in my life, and if there was anyway to keep you and raise you, I would...
I was only 16 years old when you were  born...
I was not married and your birth father left me when he found out that I was pregnant...
I couldn’t possibly raise you on my own...
My parents would have helped me, but you were my responsibility not theirs...
I wanted to be the one who raised you, not them...
Placing you for adoption was one of the most hardest things I ever had to do...
You were and are a part of me, and when you left you took my heart with you...
I don’t want you to ever think that I didn’t and don’t love you...
You will forever be remembered in my heart and my prayers...
I wanted you to have a great life, and I knew if I didn’t place you for adoption, you wouldn’t have a great life...
I hope one day you will be able to forgive me for what I did...
But if you cannot, I will understand....
I love you so much sweetheart...
Please don’t ever forget that...
Please...
I love you..
Love forever..
Your biological mother
My song to you from me is by Bryan Adams...It’s called “Everything I do, I do it for you”...
Please listen to it and try to understand
I love you!

4 comments:

Erin and Co. said...

Loved that video! Oh man.!

Jennifer said...

This definitely brought tears to my eyes. I noticed on the video that it was posted by the child. What a great thing for him to have a loving letter from his mom.

Ashley said...

Did you have to read the book "Dear Birthmom"? It was given to us by our SW thru Bethany. It has a lot of letters like that in it~ so insightful for us adoptive moms!

Brittany said...

Beautiful. I give so much credit to girls that do this. They are so brave.